Heart and Miles

Why do some take family for granted? I have lived the majority of my life away from my family. In my teen years I chose to run away for months at a time because I didn't feel like my family understood me or didn't really care. As I have gotten older I realize that I really enjoy being around my family and I want them to know that they are an important part of my life.

Just recently my niece visited New Jersey for her friends wedding and we got to hang out for a couple of hours. Now we had been estranged for about a year and a half over a misunderstanding and it was nice to see her again. I do have to say that it was a little awkward which is a shame since we were so close for so long. We had a special kind of relationship as we both were growing up and as she got older I wanted to help in anyway I could. She has always held a special place in my heart. There have been times that I have cried because we laugh so hard when we are together. I miss that!! Here's a picture of the two of us when she was last out.

Jasmine has a great personality and she is one of the most beautiful people I know. However, I am jealous of her and her mother living so close to my mom and dad and not appreciating that fact. For whatever reason, my sister seems to not want a relationship with my mother and father but it has been them who have helped her so much along the way. I was told that she didn't even want to spend Mother's Day with my mom! That burns me up!!! As I get older, so do my parents and the reality of their mortality hits me more and more and I can't understand why my family in Texas doesn't want to spend more time with their loved ones. I believe there will be many regrets for them.

I know that we, as human beings tend to take for granted those things that are with us all the time, but I feel like I have a different perspective on family then most. I long for that sense of family here and I look for it in those that are in my church, but I have yet to find it. That alone saddens me. I was brought up in the church and the church that I attend now talks of wanting to live out the Acts 2 church, but we don't. Many people here have been born here or grown up here and have family so their need is not as great as mine and it is hard to find people that both Craig and I can be close too. So I keep searching with the hope that one day, I will be close to my family not only in heart but in miles as well.

What we did today

So we went to church where I had a hard time concentrating because of what happened on Friday. I will go into that with another post, but we came home Craig worked on the trailer and the girls played with their friend Gabby. After she left we ate dinner and then I started jones-ing for something sweet and had nothing so I decided it would be a good mother daughter thing to make cookies.

We made Peanut butter cookies and oatmeal cookies. YUMMMMM!

My How Time Flies

I was taking some time for myself today, it's as if I am trying to gear up to be creative. But I am sick, and not feeling well. Anyway, I was looking at this website that I belong to called Two Peas in a Bucket. It is a scrapbooking website, and I haven't been there in a really long time. I want to scrap while I am off from school in the next 3 weeks, it has been forever since I have scrapped. They have a store you can order supplies from, a message board, and now a blog. So I was just looking through and decided to look at me profile. It has been 6 years since I updated my profile. I used to be a stay at home mom, my children used to be 5 and 6 years old. I had been married for almost 10 years. Things are different now.

Now I work part time at a doctor's office scheduling surgeries, part time college student; going for a nursing degree. My children are coming up on their 10th and 11th birthdays, and this past September my husband and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary.
It's amazing how time marches on. My life is very busy right now, I am working toward a goal. Sometimes, I think that my family suffers for it. Does it matter that they suffer now so that we can have a better life, or will they not see it that way and be angry with me later on in life? Will they understand? It is important for my family to know that I love them, both my children and my husband.